Why the Silver Medalist Cries and Other Things I Learned Last Week.

Our epic travels are done; a brave experiment was conducted as to whether or not traveling for two back-to-back Regionals was going to be a GOOD idea or a BAD idea.

Well, as most of our adventures seem to go, it turned out that wasn’t so much about the outcome as it was about the journey and what we learned along the way.   

***

Last year, you may recall, the NC Regional was the site of a Major Crisis of Confidence. It was one of those weekends that made me seriously reconsider well, everything.  My handling, my attitude, The Dog’s attitude, our combined mental fortitude, our knowledge, skills, abilities, etc etc… it was all center stage suddenly and not making the cut.  

It was pretty sad-making.

But as sad as I was, when the time came that I chose to continue or not, I picked continue.  I was not immediately rewarded. The Nationals dealt another blow shortly thereafter.  (I know this comes over as very dramatic- I realize none of this is life or death and in the end that the joy is where I make it. But- and I know I’m not alone- there IS a lot of joy in attainment and if you aren’t emotionally invested to some degree, then I’d ask you- why bother?)

***

After the Nationals, it became clear that we needed Change. There was no way I’d reach the level of Attainment with The Dog that I wanted without it. 

Enter: Daisy Peel, mental management and the best piece of throwaway advice I’ve ever received.

One changed the way I approached the course, one the way I ran the course and the other the way I felt about the course.  The end result was that, at least sometimes, and with growing frequency, we could run to our potential. And when it mattered!

***

Coming full circle then, after a year of what I would call True Investment, we land back at the NC Regional.  I had hoped there would be some amount of redemption- that I would be able to say THERE. Hard work pays off. See how different?  Truthfully, it was different. But the end result on paper? The same.  No byes. Still a sad car ride home, feeling very upset.  And then angry with myself for feeling very upset because I’d set a goal of getting through the weekend with a happy dog who could hold her own against some good competition and we had achieved that goal.  SHE did great. We had no melting or bad runs with Es and actually had some frickin’ fantastic moments with just some plain, old fashioned Bad Luck in the runs that really mattered.  But I could not stop thinking “a whole year later and I’m still sad in the car???” Silent Screaming and all that. 

So, while I initially thought the Russian gymnasts were being dramatic, crying over their silver medals, I sort of get it.  Because you HAVE to invest big if you’re going to even get to the Olympics.  Big investments = big disappointments if you can’t make it the most amazing performance of your life when you need it to be.   I decided that it was okay for the silver medalists to cry.   But then what?

Now again, I was at somewhat of a crossroads. After doing literally everything I thought possible to set myself up for a great weekend, and not (on paper) having the outcome I’d expected, I could likely look to the second Regional as DOOOOOOM…

But luckily, the night I arrived back home, I read “Freedom Flight,” a story of sorts that was a thinly veiled mental management guide.   The story was weak but the message was oh so strong. And appropriate.  At the heart of this book is the reminder that sometimes, it is just not your time…Yet. But if you want it enough, doors open.   Events do fall in line, but not until they are supposed to and until then you get what you need.  The first Regional…not ours.  But not time wasted. I learned exactly what to do to have success the following weekend.  Sure enough, from the moment we arrived, everything fell in line.  Doors falling open. I wasn’t worried about the outcome, because I already knew what it would be. 

Maybe it’s My Time to play the lottery too?

*** 

Pup and her Cat

Cat Wuvs Pup!

Whaaaa? I get to spend THREE DAYS WITH MY CAT??

The Very Serious Sheriff of Rm 108

Black Dog! Big Mouth!

Reunited! 

Solidarity!

More Big Mouth

Wittle Mouth

Posed for pouncing.

Artsy medal pose.

Medal jealousy and photo crashing.

Grin and Bear it

Because really, what else can you do?

***

Trial last weekend, filled with lots of successes though most won’t be reported to the AKC.

And that’s ok.

***

My goals for the weekend were to:

Focus on the process NOT the outcome

Work to mentally rehearse the look AND feel of each run before hand (this is harder than you’d think!)

Control my “self-talk”

Play within our skill set which includes trusting the skill set we do have

Find a routine that I can apply before and after every run and, well, apply it.

***

Yes, if it sounds like I’ve been reading self-help books, I sort of did.  After I read Blink (which was AWESOME) I decided to read With Winning in Mind because the former frequently referenced the latter and, as mentioned, I had decided that mental management was probably a necessary step.

WWiM turned out to be pretty awesome also, and not TOO self-helpy so I didn’t feel completely sad and desperate.  Lots of very thought-provoking ideas in there.  I recognized some things that I had been doing that were working against me, so now have decided it is no longer “like me” to do them. Take THAT, stupid limiting self-image! I’ll teach YOU to be lame and keep me at some bogus ‘comfort level.’

Or something like that.

Is it bad to yell at your self-image? He didn’t directly address that.

***

Anyways, so based on my goals it was a great, successful weekend.  It really did help to try and mentally run through the feel of the run in advance.  I found that I held to my plan much better than before.  I also was WAY better about focusing on the process before, during and after- each maneuver, each obstacle, each course matters, not the outcome.   Again, it helped me stick to my plan better and forced me to consider the skill set item more carefully. As a result, I think we did a great job in working our strengths.  And for me, a big ‘win’- I did not make the same mistake twice. Hooray for learning and adapting!!

I found a few things that we are calling ‘successes in process’ i.e. things to improve with a plan already in place.  While overall the ‘routine’ worked well (happy happy Startline Dog!), I’m still searching for a solution to the issue of waking The Dog up before the first JWW run when she is first dog.  My idea is to wake us up REALLY early and go for a run those days.  Since I probably can’t give her 5 Hour Energy. 

And I’m working on the ‘self-talk.’ I will be better next time.

***

Overall, I have to say The Dog looked amazing. She was feeling SO much better after her adjustments and moving really nice. Her jumping was back to effortless and her extension was FULL. This was probably the best and most consistent jumping I’ve seen of her in a show.  To think it will only get better!  She was really fun to run on those courses, very challenging and interesting standard set-ups. Her attention to my motion and location cues was tested pretty heavily and she read every line I put her on perfectly AND is really nailing the decel/front cross cues now.  Lastly, glowing over her perfect contacts. Last DW was a tough push into space with a 90 degree turn following and she ran off and responded so well. Glowing!!

***

The Pup ran as well- possibly her last show for the summer. We'll see. I pulled her from the next trial and am still debating the memorial weekend three day, then she isn't entered after that.  

While her first run was filled with social calls, she came back and had REALLY good focus for the other three runs.  She waited on the table!! And the teeter!! And maintained all her other good behaviors!! So much improved.  She even got a standard Q!

However- she is clearly a baby still. Her brain needs more time to bake. I don’t want to run the risk of rehearsing the unwanted or shutting her down because I have to get on her about the one naughty thing that continued- trying to leave the ring at the end to get her cookies!! Naughty ring-wise Pup!! I noticed for her second, third and fourth runs that although her focus was awesome, she faded out on me a bit for the last few obstacles. By the last run I knew why- she was anticipating leaving and getting treats. WAY TOO SMART.  I did manage to catch her after the clean standard run, but she unfortunately vacated without me after a lovely JWW run, so NQ there! She NQ’d the other Standard run after running into me (blocking, even if it was her head crushing my leg!) because she stopped focusing at the last obstacle and I was in the way of the path to the treats. So we are planning to teach her to target the bucket (yes, worth the risk!). 

So we will take at least a month to work on that. Plus I will start classes with her again. Time for her to get to be ok with people in the ring. I think I’ve asked enough people to hop out when we run. So after we solve THOSE issues, we will worry about finding more. Whether this happens before the memorial day trial is up to The Pup!

Video!

***

Project Puppy Nephew is doing awesome as well. He is so much fun.  And I can’t believe how well he retains things- we can go a week or two without working something and he always comes back stronger! Latent Learning is his BFF. 

He has mastered:

Targeting with his paw

Back up

Here (which means he has to shove into my hand with his collar, since he didn’t like being held)

Tunnel (ruh-roh! A little TOO much!)

Table with an auto-down

Four feet in a box

2o2o

Four feet on

TUGGING!

RECALLS!

And has started:

Plank familiarization

Wobble boards

Perch work (starting to move back feet really well!

Front crosses

Circle work (he SO wants to herd me)

Falling in love with Marvin the MM

Cone work

Such a party with the Nephew!!

***

Oh, and my opening advice - grin and bear it!

Sometimes, it’s all you can do. Like when your glasses fall off during your fabulous run and you are blinded and send your dog in the wrong tunnel. Because you are blind.

And then everyone gives you duct tape to prevent this from happening again.

The best thing to do?

LAUGH, BECAUSE IT IS FUNNY!

But then get contacts. 

Ban on Bad

I have a lot of swirly whirly thoughts right now.

The good news: none of them are bad!

Good thing #1. The Dog is fixed!

After her last show I was seriously worried that she had somehow reinjured her shoulder.  I put her on the Boring Regime. How boring for her.  Even on the Boring Regime her stride was hinky, so after a few days I asked my student (wonderful, generous student who is a vet) if she wouldn’t mind watching her walk to see if I was crazy or not.  Wonderful, generous student she is, she did a full on chiro adjustment and evaluation. Love!  Poor little Dog was all kinds of out of sorts in her neck, which explains what I was seeing in her gait and jumping.  We had a follow up at my normal chiro vet Tuesday who did a little work with her spine but declared NO SHOULDER ISSUE! Woo! and cleared her back to Normal Regime.  Thank all that is holy because…

Good thing #2. We had a seminar with Daisy Peel Wednesday!

I’m so aglow after yesterday.  It was exactly what I needed.  Were we perfect? Nope. But finally FINALLY we are getting somewhere. 

The last day of the seminar was “Handling like a Pro.” Lots of jumps, tunnels and weaves.   Slightly awkward lines, Trappy McTrapperson off course draws and- a ban on verbal directional cues.  She wanted us to work on communicating with our bodies.  Well, to be more specific, our shoulders and legs.  Not so much the windmill arms or jazz hands.  And that we had to rely on MOTION CUES and LOCATION CUES.  You know, work on running our dogs off the things THEY actually care about not what we think they should care about.  I felt a bit…auggghhh! before we ran the first courselet. Because like, I use directionals. And I use jazz hands.  And historically The Dog doesn’t follow my motion cues OR location cues correctly (remember, obstacles focused doggy?). But if I learned anything from the day, I learned that The Dog has officially gotten the memo on motion. And has received the letter on location.  She paid attention!  To me! 

I forgot how much I liked getting A’s on homework.  Totally an awesome feeling.  All the homework we have tackled since our private two months ago made yesterday feel like we just completed a HUGE assignment and PASSED the test. 

Of course, now there is MORE homework.  As expected, Daisy delivered another round of amazing insight.  She suggested The Dog is ‘test ticking’ bars to see if I will maintain criteria or let her off.  The Dog was a bit sloppy to start and well, I let her off easy since she hadn’t run in two weeks.  But Daisy said THBBBT to that and after I started *trying* to mark ticks instead of drops. It was interesting. If I let a tick go, there were more until a bar came down, then bars (plural). But when I stopped the sequence, she got better.  It is SO like the dog to do something like ‘test tick’ bars so I’ll work with the theory for awhile.   I can believe it because she started her circling a little after I stopped her several times (it’s better though!) BUT did not circle when I kept making a mistake (like 10 times…oops) and stopped her. HMMM.  So anyways. We will up criteria on bars and see!

The other ridiculously helpful thing that was pointed out- apparently what I have called an issue with making difficult weave entries is actually an issue with a certain Leader forgetting to tell a certain Dog to WEAVE.   I’ve convinced myself that I need to manage her weaves for so long that I’ve stopped telling her what to do and actually do everything but. We worked on two tough entries and she missed them both.  Daisy pointed out that I either didn’t ever SAY “weave” or I waited until it was too late (like, she was past the plane). But as soon as I cued with good timing, she adjusted herself and got in.

GA!! 

Sorry Dog, guess we aren’t codependent on weaves after all.

But.

Good thing #3. The Dog is amazing. 

And well trained! I think I’m really starting to understand. I’ve sort of made excuses for her and have done the kid gloves thing for awhile. She is my little bird! I feel so protective of her. But I suppose it’s time to have some faith.  She IS amazing and I want so much for everyone else to see this too.  For that to happen though, I have to just let go of some of the history, because it’s ancient now.  The only thing in our way is…me!

Good thing #4. No really, knowing that is a good thing!

I’ve decided that while she may be accident prone and there IS a history to deal with, those things don’t account for all our issues.  And they don’t define her now or even explain the last hurdles we still have to overcome. What’s left is in my head.  It’s hard to explain. I’ve never had a ‘mental management’ problem, at least not in the traditional sense. In general (everyone has an off day!), I feel like I look at things the ‘right way’ and have maintained positivity and perspective.  I don’t focus on winning or dwell on losing. Shows and competition thrill me- they don’t make me want to barf.  With my Sheltie, I had the ‘show zen’ thing perfected and I feel that way with The Pup.  Even if she is a bit of an a&$hole at the moment I have this weird peace- I’m totally secure when it comes to her future and clear minded when it comes to her. Something about The Dog just plays with my head and my heart though. Because I care SO MUCH and a million other little things.  And lately I have felt like MY issues are turning into OUR issues.  Well.  No more.  I started suspecting a few months ago that our last hurdles were going to be more about my self-improvement than hers.  

Sooo… mental management 101! WEE!

A little research and reading points out quite a few ‘easy’ adjustments to make.  It’s not just maintaining positivity and perspective.   Or good goal-setting.  There is so much about having faith and focus in the process that I need to learn, ESPECIALLY when it comes to The Dog. While I might not need an entire 180 on my thought process, some things are skewed that can do with realignment.  

Good thing #5. Step one: Ban the bad!

No, this doesn’t mean The Pup is moving out.  Negativity no longer has a place here. Nor does complaining. Or excuses.  I’m just… done.  I don’t want to hear it because hear it, be it.  Don’t tell me you can’t. Tell me you can.

Otherwise, I’m going to have to turn into one of those people who walk course with earphones.

You’ve been warned!!